There is nothing I can do.
The world keeps turning, the engines keep running, but I am stuck in a downward spiral with no one left to pull me out.
I’m an idiot, a liar, a disgrace and whatever else you want to call me. Go ahead. It’s nothing I haven’t told myself a thousand times over. You’re completely right.
It doesn’t change the outcome though and I have to live with that for the rest of my life. There is no light at the end of the tunnel for me, no chance at redemption. I don’t deserve it, but I still want to carve my little slice of happiness out from the mess I created.
I’m asking you to believe me.
I’m asking them to forgive me.
I’m asking him to save me.
But maybe I’m asking just a little too much.