And although I broke a lot of laws as a teenager I straightened out immediately upon turning eighteen when I realized the state had a legal right to execute me.
George Carlin
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I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.
- George Carlin -
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The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin