I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something's wrong with me. Elayne Boosler Next Quote When the sun comes up, I have morals again. - Elayne Boosler Previous Quote I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. - Elayne Boosler