Fergen is a happy little fish who loves to swim and play in the sea with his sisters. But when his parents break the unexpected news that they're getting divorced and that he and his sisters will have to move to a new home, his carefree life as a free-floating fish goes belly-up!Fergen doesn't know how to process his feelings about such a big change, but his father, having been through something similar himself as a young fish, knows what might help. He takes Fergen to visit a wise old fish named Sam, who has experience with "fish feelings" and the wisdom to help Fergen understand his new, scary emotions. Written by a therapist and with vivid illustrations of charming characters, Little Fergen's Fish Feelings offers a positive approach to helping a child learn to cope with the volatility and emotional reality of divorce.
BIOGRAPHY Author Info EDIT BIO
As a father and a therapist with thirty-five years of experience who went through divorce and who watched the emotional impact it had on my child and later on my stepson, I conceived and wrote Little Fergen's Fish Feelings.
I have worked with many children who have suffered from the effects of divorce. What I've learned over time is that the problems triggered as a result of parental divorce, such as feelings, are at the core of many emotional imbalances kids experience as they grow and learn to navigate life.
Fergen developed over time. The idea came to me in the early stages of my divorce but went dormant for ten years. During that time, I continued to practice and study, learning more about trauma and how trauma impacts the development of a child's brain. I learned about attachment, how to treat trauma, hypnosis, parenting, and family therapy. Currently, I have studied Intensive Short-Term Dynamic Psychotherapy (ISTDP). As a result, what became clear to me as a therapist is the critical importance of tending to the feelings that occur in all of us every day. It is both interesting and sad that emotion, which is ultimately our collective birthright as human beings, is disavowed, and that people, specifically children, are shamed for feeling their feelings. When our feelings are left unprocessed and unacknowledged, they can have an extremely negative effect on people and become the foundation for anxiety disorders, depression, behavioral problems, and other physiological difficulties.
I recommend that therapists and parents alike use Fergen, either for therapists to read to their patients, or for parents to read over and over to their children. For parents who are in the process of divorcing, I recommend that each parent reads Fergen to their child or children, to provide continuity and reinforcement.
Fergen provides guidance about feelings for both the children and the parents. For parents who are also taught to shy away from their feelings, or to relegate the more intense feelings to the back part of their minds, they can pass this learning on to their children. Although Fergen is a children’s story, the book contains knowledge for the parents as well.
For more information, please visit my website athttp://cmipsychotherapy.com/qualifications.html
Thank you for reading Little Fergen's Fish Feelings. You can find it at http://cmipsychotherapy.com/therapyToolShop.html
Little Fergen's Fish Feelings: ...And How He Learns to Cope with his Parents' Divorce. (1)
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