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Maryann Miller
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A Dead Tomato Plant and a Paycheck Kindle Edition

by Maryann Miller (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
5.0 out of 5 stars 5 ratings
What on earth do a dead tomato plant and a paycheck have in common? Maryann Miller explores the fun and foibles of how to survive parenting a large family, while vainly keeping body and mind intact. From School Daze to Summertime Blues, and everything in between, the book airs the Miller laundry with all the holes and missing buttons. She answers important family questions such as: What's for dinner? Who wrote the dirty words on the wall? Can we really pee in the woods? Do the kids really like the dog better than Mom? Readers of the humor column, from which this books comes, delighted in The Great Lasagna Caper, the fits of tantrum that demolished a telephone, The Lawn Wars, who is and who isn't Socially Acceptable, and the crazy dinnertime conversations. Those readers could relate, as will mothers and father and kids today. Nothing really changes all that much in family dynamics. Just the names are changed to protect the innocent.
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  1. Reading age
    10 - 18 years
  2. Print length
    215 pages
  3. Language
    English
  4. Accessibility
    Learn more
  5. Publication date
    August 15, 2018
  6. Page Flip
    Enabled
  7. Word Wise
    Enabled
  8. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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Editorial Reviews

From the Author

I wrote the weekly humor column for a Dallas suburban newspaper for a little over five years and it was great fun, as well as a satisfying creative outlet. Often, one must laugh to keep from crying, and laughing has much nicer effects on your face. No running mascara for one. Whether you are new at parenting, or looking back at the time when young people littered your life, I'm sure you will be able to relate. Enjoy...

About the Author

Maryann Miller is an award-winning author of numerous books, screenplays, and stage plays. She started her professional career as a journalist, writing columns, feature stories, and short fiction for regional and national publications.
Having a long-time love affair with live theatre,  Miller has been associated with high school drama departments as a production assistant and advisor for stage productions and student films. For fifteen years she was the Theatre Director at the Winnsboro Center for the Arts, where she worked with actors young and young at heart.
Now she writes primarily mysteries, including the critically-acclaimed Seasons Mystery Series that features two women homicide detectives. Think "Lethal Weapon" set in Dallas with female leads. The first two books in the series, OPEN SEASON and STALKING SEASON have received starred reviews from Publisher's Weekly, Kirkus, and Library Journal. STALKING SEASON Season was chosen for the John E. Weaver Excellence in Reading award for Police Procedural Mysteries. Her mystery, DOUBLETAKE, was honored as the Best Mystery for 2015 by the Texas Association of Authors.
Among the other awards Miller has received for her writing are the Page Edwards Short Story Award, the New York Library Best Books for Teens Award, first place in the screenwriting competition at the Houston Writer's Conference, placing as a finalist in the Top Shelf 2019 awards for A DEAD TOMATO PLANT & A PAYCHECK, placing as a semi-finalist at Sundance, and placing as a semi-finalist in the Chesterfield Screenwriting Competition.  

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B07GJXK6NN
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ MCM Enterprises
  • Accessibility ‏ : ‎ Learn more
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ August 15, 2018
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 2.4 MB
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 215 pages
  • Page Flip ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Reading age ‏ : ‎ 10 - 18 years
  • Customer Reviews:
    5.0 out of 5 stars 5 ratings

About the author

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Maryann Miller

Maryann Miller

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Maryann Miller, an award-winning author, has been in love with story-telling since she was a child and used to scare her sister with stories of the monsters in the cellar. Those tales were never written down. They were always whispered in the dark, and when Maryann started writing stories, they were different types entirely.

As a young child, she didn't consider that she would grow up to be a writer. She fancied herself quite the singer and thought she would someday sing in front of crowds of thousands. Alas, that proved to be more dream than reality.

At another point in her childhood, she dreamed of being an actress, but it took many years before she was brave enough to give it a try. For fifteen years she was the Theatre Directer at the Winnsboro Center for the Arts where she directed shows for some time before getting brave enough to step on stage. It appears she was more suited to acting than singing, and she has since starred in several productions at various community theatres in East Texas.

A diverse writer of columns, feature stores, short fiction, novels, screenplays and stage plays, Maryann has won numerous awards including being a semi-finalist at the Sundance Institute for her screenplay, A Question Of Honor. She has also received the Page Edwards Short Story Award and the 2015 Best Mystery award for Doubletake.

Miller lives in a small town in NE Texas with one dog, and four cats. The cats rule! She has been writing all her life and plans to die at her computer.

Customer reviews

5 out of 5 stars
5 global ratings

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Top reviews from the United States

  • Michael D. Smith
    5.0 out of 5 stars Concise, Readable and Definitely Funny
    Reviewed in the United States on August 25, 2019
    How did I ever wind up introduced to this fun book? It all came about when I found myself placed next to Maryann Miller at a book festival along with one of her daughters. Via Jungian synchronicity we found that I in fact had known another of the offspring at a library where I once worked. So naturally I had to have more information, which the author just happened to have handy in printed form.

    Although I’d probably never pick up a humorous biography of this sort on my own, I happily purchased A Dead Tomato Plant and a Paycheck and enjoyed it all the way through. In pulling together her weekly newspaper columns stretching back several decades--a sort of precursor to reality TV--the author fleshes out a description of a bizarre-yet-normal American household over the years of its development.

    The style is concise, readable and definitely funny. Wife, husband, five children, and numerous pets all have their day in this book. Chapters devolve around topics such as vacations, first day of school, sports, holidays, marriage, and how the author managed to hold a writing life together, and her husband his good humor, amid all the wonderful chaos generated by their children. These subjects flow seamlessly; the book never comes across as a disjointed collection of newspaper columns, but as an integrated whole.

    Especially amusing was the tale of how the kids started keeping statistics of which ones got featured and how often in the author’s weekly column. And somehow, in the face of this daunting obstacle, she just kept writing anyway.

    review by Michael D. Smith
    2 people found this helpful
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  • User
    5.0 out of 5 stars Humor is all around and author proves it!
    Reviewed in the United States on September 24, 2019
    The title caught my eye on Twitter and I had to get this. Very entertaining, with the kids, family even pets and dead tomato plants brilliantly combined. This read will have you smiling.
    I recommend you get it.
    Who doesn't want time to read this and smile it's good for the soul.
    It's so genuine I loved it, you will too
    2 people found this helpful
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