Marilyn L. Davis (In Remembrance of Marilyn)

I was born in Indiana, the older of two daughters. We moved to Tennessee when I was nine and to Georgia when I was eleven and moved to Maryland when I was seventeen. After finishing school in Maryland, I lived in Virginia and Pennsylvania. Now, I reside in Georgia. 
I miss the closeness of my parent's families in Indiana. Visiting with aunts, uncles, grandparents, and cousins on their farms was a special treat for me, the city cousin. Grooming horses, bailing hay, collecting eggs, and putting up homemade vegetables, jams, and jellies was great fun. Of course, I only had to do a limited amount, and those regular farm chores probably wouldn't have been as much fun if I had to do them daily. 

Writing for me has always been a release. Whether it's an idea, thought, or feeling, the process of writing moves those from inside my head to paper.   
I've written since I was a child to process my feelings when I was bullied, to make sense of my day in retrospect, or to write abysmal poetry. 
I remember realizing at about age four that the squiggly lines on the pages of a book told the story, and I wanted to understand how that happened, so my mother helped me learn to read at a young age. Using a Child Craft Encyclopedia, we found all the words for "cat," and trust me; there are many cats in the world -- lions, tigers, cougars, leopards, and jaguars. Then there were the domestic varieties, so although most of my vocabulary was limited, it was extensive for cats. Maybe that’s why I’ve always liked cats so much. 
I still have a fascination for words - their power, grace, and ability to engage readers.

The freedom to be someone else is a motive for storytelling. I liked the sound of Eufaula, a town in Alabama, so I created a grandmother – Nana Jane -- living there and writing to her grandchildren who lived in another state. Researching the town and remembering moments in my childhood, helped me create this fictitious character. As my work progressed, I expanded upon the fictitious aspects of the character and the town. There have been two posts from Nana Jane on my literary blog: Two Drops of Ink.  
A person familiar with Eufaula falsely assumed I had lived there -- that was when I knew that while Nana Jane was a fictional character, I'd been authentic in her background.

I immerse myself in genres until I'm saturated with the topic. Currently, I'm reading several books about "ancient scroll/codex/artifact, that if found spells doom for humanity." No, it's not a genre, but it could be. I like the following authors of this type of religious thriller: 
Khoury, Daniel Silva, Liam Fialkov, James Rollins, John Zodrow, Sam Christer, E. M. Davey, Tom Knox, Charles Brokaw.  
I also spend time reading about writing. Those authors include:  
William Strunk, Jr. Anne Lamott, Natalie Goldberg, Julie Cameron, William Zinsser, Ray Bradbury, Renni Browne, Orson Scott Card, Roy Peter Clark, and Vladimir Nabokov. 

For years, friends and associates told me that the story of meeting Gray Hawk and opening North House would be an interesting read. My original challenge was overcoming my fear of exposing myself. I don't think I realized how vulnerable I would feel. But I overcame that fear with the encouragement of two caring beta readers and editors who told me there were people who would “Want” to read my story and that there were people who “Needed” to read my story. 
The second challenge was formatting. I finally hired someone to do that part for me and did that again with Memoires into Memoir: The Mindsets and Mechanics Workbook.  
I write - they format. Once I defined the roles, the challenge was no longer an issue. 

I celebrated in my usual way by picking up a chip to commemorate the years at my recovery support meeting. It's not about vainglory. It’s more about letting a newcomer know that long-term recovery is possible. There's cake and speeches and fellowship with other recovering addicts, so it's always a good time. Think birthday and anniversary rolled into one. 

Trial by fire.  
I only had seventeen months in recovery when I opened North House, but I was emboldened by Gray Hawk, a 74-year old Native American who told me he had been trying to find me for over 20 years. 
Gray Hawk told me that he had "seen" in a sweat lodge ceremony in Virginia that he should go to Gainesville, GA, to find the woman who would open the house of healing for other women. 
We met when I had ten months in recovery, and I was resistant, hesitant, and uncertain about his vision; and I did everything I could to forestall opening the house. But as he believed: if something is meant to be, it will happen. Meeting Gray Hawk helped me to find my purpose and to make it happen -- to open and run North House.  
For 21 years, I helped other women heal; and in turn, I was healed myself. 

Finding anything takes searching, looking, and being observant -- all things addicts have to do in recovery.  
North is the direction of rest, renewal, and cleansing in Lakota cultures. It's why the house was named as it was. (Naming the house is a whole other story -- in the book.)   In our recovery, we must rest -- stop our use, renew a connection to a higher power, and cleanse those things within us that prevent us from living a productive, happy, and helpful life.  
Whether it's the direction of True North or the underlying beliefs, North holds great significance for me. 

While writing my memoir, I read all I could about memoir writing. There are some excellent books out there. After my book was published, I decided to incorporate what I learned from writing my memoir into a workbook for others. Helping people understand the mindsets and mechanics was the purpose of the workbook.  
I also wanted to provide questions to help memoirists delve into their memories using techniques that are usually associated with recovery.  
As with any workbook, there are lined pages to answer the questions and create drafts, and hopefully, writers will write their memoir in less time and with fewer obstacles than I made for myself when writing mine. 
This book took about 6 months to write, edit, format, and publish.

I would not be the person I am today without meeting him. He, like my father, saw potential in me that I did not. He encouraged me to work on myself, make changes, and then help others.  
He challenged me, pushed me, and mentored me in my recovery and in opening the house.  
Gray Hawk had 34 years in recovery when I met him, so his knowledge was invaluable. He had also worked in the treatment field for over 20 years, so his familiarity with an excellent residential program helped me form the program at North House. 

I consider myself one -- although it may be a bit cliché now.   
I think it's someone who genuinely loves to read, reads daily, and is always looking for the next book.  
I love sites that give me a similar book to choose from, and I find Thrift Books a great resource. Thus, I'm still reading the codex, antique, religious thriller books. And they are discounted! 
I was also known as the List Lady at my library because I'd come in with a list, get my allotted number, return them on time, and get more. Does that qualify for avid? 

That certification helped me "meet people where they are," not where I thought they should be. Recovery is not a linear path. There are ups and downs, plateaus, and sometimes setbacks. While I have not relapsed since getting into recovery on September 30, 1988, others have, and often, people working with the addicted population will shame someone who relapses. I try to help them understand what transpired before the relapse and then help them set up safe alternatives to use in the future.  
Sometimes we addicts want someone who's "been there" to guide us rather than someone with only a certification or education. There are great values to peer advice, suggestions, and directions. 
In working with others, they know I'm in recovery but don't necessarily know what my educational background or certification is.  

My grandson named him when he was about eight years old. He was reading one of the Rick Riordan books about Percy Jackson. He didn't want Percy because it sounded too close to Pussy Cat, and he thought that sounded too "girly." Jackson is a male Russian Blue rescue, so we settled on Jackson.  

Writing for my blogs, FromAddict2Advocate.com and Twodropsofink.com, as well as editing guest posts for both sites.  
Readers, consider a guest post. Please send them to 
fromaddict2advocate@yahoo.com. 
I'm also editing a novel for another writer and thoroughly enjoying that experience.  
I have two other books in mind, so stay tuned...

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