What were you like as a child? Who was your role model growing up?
I was a quiet, shy, and scared kid. I suffered through several years of sexual abuse in early childhood, as well as being bullied at school. I felt small, dirty, and damaged. Thankfully, meeting Jesus changed all this. Because of Him, I began to heal and discover who I really was. I guess you could say that Jesus was my role model. After that it would be my dad and my swim coaches.
Were you an avid reader as a child? Do you still read books?
Yes, I was a regular reader, but mostly a result of summer library contests. In high school, I couldn't stand reading anything over 100 pages. Then I found The Hobbit. That changed everything. I've been an avid reader ever since. In the past few years, I've noticed a change. I read only non-fiction at present, though I'm not sure why that is.
How did you discover that you wanted to be a writer?
I began writing poetry in high school as a way to process my dad's sudden death. That led into writing devotional materials for churches that I pastored. It wasn't until I was about 50, however, that I felt a clear draw to write.
What fears did you have while publishing your first novel book?
I was afraid it would flop. After all, what could I say that someone else hasn't already said? I felt like I was putting my heart out there for people to look at and evaluate. My heart had already been stepped on enough in life, so that was a bit terrifying.
What does a grief specialist really do?
That's a good question. It's not an exact title or job description. When people ask, "What's a grief specialist?", I typically say, "I walk with people through deep and sometimes dark valleys of loss. My goal is to love them and help them heal and grow. I do that through writing books and resources, public speaking, and personal grief coaching."
When was the first time you spoke on the stage?
Outside of assignments for school, it was in college. I was a student leader in InterVarsity Christian Fellowship and had multiple opportunities to present Bible messages and talks.
What is the most challenging part of helping hurting people heal?
For me, the hardest thing is making sure I take enough time to process the grief load that comes with interacting with so many grieving people. I do a lot of praying, talking, and writing about what I'm encountering in the world and other people's lives.
In what ways do you think your books help the reader to feel comfortable, encouraged, and inspired?
Many of my books are written as conversations - at least that's the way I like to look at it. They are designed to be companions for the grief journey. Chapters often begin with someone's story, or with "the grieving heart" speaking. My goal is to connect with the reader's heart. If people feel understood, they begin to feel safe. If they feel safe, it opens the heart up to heal and grow. Readers often say things like, "I saw myself in every chapter," "It's like you were inside my head and heart." and "I felt like I was listening to a personal conversation, and I was a part of it."
How did you begin writing the Good Grief Series?
It didn't begin as a series, of course, but as one book - Surviving the Holidays Without You. As I published more books, someone suggested combining them into a series, which is what ended up happening. I also have the God & Grief Series (grief devotionals) and the Comfort Series.
What challenges did you face while writing your book, Grief Walk?
The toughest part of writing Grief Walk was knowing where and when to stop. That book could have gone on for another 350 pages. Writing of Grief Walk was fairly natural. Writing comforting, healing, and motivating devotional material is energizing for me. I'm grateful for the opportunity to write that book.
What is your writing kryptonite? Inversely, what is something that never fails to inspire you?
A new idea. Boom. I get started pretty quickly. I guess I'm a producer. I feel like there is no end of grief books - different painful scenarios, loss, and traumas - that could be written. It's a never-ending task and privilege.
What is it about your books that you think makes them special and stand out from the rest?
Most grief recovery resources fall into two categories: psychological resources and memoir-type grief books. Mine books are somewhere in the middle. They're written to be warm and personal, but also broad (from many people's experiences) and intensely practical. I guess I'm more of a practitioner than a theorist.
Name one author you'd love to collaborate with.
Well, the one author I would love to work with is C.S. Lewis, but that's not possible. In Lewis' absence, H. Norman Wright would be a wonderful choice.
Are you working on anything at the present you would like to share with your readers?
There is a stunning amount of change going on in our world. The grief is massive. Sadness, anger, fear, and anxiety have reached epic proportions. I'm continually thinking and praying about this and how to help us navigate this in our hearts and minds.
Lastly, what are your thoughts and opinions on All Author and its services?
I have found All Author to be terrific, personal, and highly interactive. So far, I love it and am very grateful.